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Struggling to Meet Expectations |
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Despite my best efforts to prepare myself mentally for the inevitable, I have
failed my exam. I had hoped to be like Su Dongpo, the great poet and scholar
known for his equanimity in the face of life's ups and downs. But when reality
hit, I realized that I am just an ordinary person who lacks his serenity.
I had resolved not to cry, but the bitter disappointment I felt brought tears to
my eyes once again. I had thought that if I lifted my head, the tears would not
fall, but they did, scorching my cheeks and dampening my hair.
I used to look down on the busy people on the street, feeling sorry for their
lack of passion and joy in life. But now I realize that I am just like them, a
speck of dust blown by the wind of life.
I am so tired, but I cannot rest. People say that I am lucky and happy because I
usually do well on exams and have parents who love me deeply. But their love has
become a burden that weighs heavily on my shoulders, and I cannot bear it.
Perhaps my shoulders are too weak, or maybe my will is too feeble. I cannot meet
their expectations, and I fear I will disappoint them. So I keep trying,
striving to fulfill my dreams and to keep the shooting stars hidden from the
eyes of others. |
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